Love is not Possessive

- Love is not possessive -

• A truly creative person is one who breathes love every moment of his life.
• By love I mean a sensitive heart and not a sentimental heart.
• A sensitive heart experiences 'what is' with awe; a sentimental person reacts to 'what is'

Love is the only savior in this world. Love unites and hate divides.
Society has witnessed life based on likes and dislikes, on greed and hate and hence loveless lives. From the foundation of love, your likes and dislikes will become preferences, your greed will transform into a commitment to excel, and your hate will be transformed into concerns. People have preached about love but the undercurrent has been hate. A wise man has to be created with a new heart. A heart without love is on the path of destruction.

• If your state of being is love then your struggles will also be sacred, or there will be no struggles at all.
• If you are a lover of dogs then the tricks of the dogs become an act of joy.
• We talk of love but we are not in a state of love.
• We only pretend to be in love. Our pretensions become better and manipulative.
• A deceptive front starts to build in us.
• A deceptive and pretentious self is noisy and restless. You try to eliminate this restlessness by wrong means and then you throw the garbage of this restlessness on the other. This process makes relationships very messy.

When your state of being is love, then there is no manipulative game. You are silent and restful. This silence you shower on the partner and therefore, more than the intimacy, there is an exchange of silence. This quality of relationship is fulfilling.

• Our love life is not love but desires masquerading as love.
• Love makes no conditions.
• Love never demands,
• "Fulfill my expectations then I will love you." But most of our love life is like that.

Because of the demand, our relationships are like beggars begging from the other. If two beggars meet beggary is going to increase. In a state of love you will not be a beggar but a giver. Giving comes from love that has no conditions. The joy of giving is bigger than the petty logic of 'if' and 'but'.

When one is silent in the deepest core of one's being, love arises like a fragrance. Such love is unconditional; like the fragrance of the flower it does not create conditions regarding whom to give fragrance to and whom not to give. In this space you give love – and the person concerned is not obliged. You will feel grateful that there is someone who is receiving your love.

Conditional love sends out messages like this: “I have done so much for you, so now you should do this for me.” Or “I need your attention, your sympathy, your consent, your time, your presence, your love.” Or “I want you to live your life according to my beliefs and ideas.” “I need you to need me, and to look after me exactly the way I have in mind.” “And if you don’t do that, I will fall ill or become very unhappy.”

This kind of relationship is psychologically suffocating, and can be even physically suffocating, for the person(s) it concerns. It does not allow personal space to the other one. The path the other one has chosen for his/her life is deliberately surpassed for the sake of someone’s egocentric purposes.

Deep down hidden in the soul of the demanding and possessive person dwells a needy little child, longing for love and appreciation. Under the surface lies deep seated insecurity and fear of loss, especially of relationships. They have difficulty with experiencing self-love and self-acceptance, and the behavior they show is a great example of compensation.

The whole economics of love is that you become richer when you give love.